Knowing how to clean a water jug is one of the most important skills a prepper can have.
Its not as glamorous as weapons training or learning how to survive in the woods, but believe me, its crucial.
(By the way, these jugs are awesome.)
You can’t survive without water, so you need to store it any way you can. That means having clean containers.
In this article, I’ll teach you how to easily clean any water jug or bottle in under 3 minutes without using a brush or harsh chemicals like bleach.
No algae is safe from my wrath.
Many decades ago, and evil agreement was made by the manufacturers of water bottles and the distributors of bottle brushes and cleaning agents to only sell containers that were super hard to clean.
Notice how the adult human hand can’t easily fit inside most water bottles.
Not even my wife, blessed by the gods with the tiny hands of a pickpocket, can get her hand inside.
When it comes to jugs, most bottle brushes won't fit. Even if it does, its usually too short and flimsy to scrub the bottom.
Forget about reaching the inner sides of the bottle.
This problem weighed heavily on my mind for many years, until an old gypsy woman who appeared to me in a forest told me her secret technique.
She told me everything she knew about how to clean a water jug, then she de-materialized before I could thank her.
I write this article as a tribute to her and to gypsy women everywhere.
Even the purest water isn’t usually free from microorganisms. A little sunlight, and your bottles will soon have a slight green tint. That’s algae growing inside!
Don’t worry, its usually harmless. In fact, scientists are researching algae as a potential source of food for the human race after cows, chickens, and pigs go extinct.
But its ugly and it can make your water taste funky, so let’s learn how to clean a water jug before your friends see it and begin judging you.
First, throw away that bottle brush and toss your bleach out the nearest window. Brushes and bleach are for chumps who don’t know how to clean a water jug.
This method is superior to all others methods. Divulging it will probably get me assassinated by the leaders of the bottle brush crime syndicate, but I don’t care. The world needs to hear this!
Step 1: Pour a little bit of vinegar, a couple tablespoons of baking soda, and a handful of rice into your bottle.
Its hard for me to give specific amounts because I don’t know whether you’re cleaning a personal water bottle, a 1 gallon jug, or a 5 gallon jug.
Its pretty hard to mess up, though.
Just make sure you put enough vinegar to easily dissolve the baking soda, and that its thin enough to splash around hard when you shake your container, which brings us to...
Step 2: Shake the ever loving sh*t out of your container!
The vinegar/baking soda dissolves the grime inside and the rice acts as an abrasive, easily scratching, pounding, and devastating any and all algae inside your bottle.
This unholy concoction gets everywhere your bottle brush cannot. It uses no harsh chemicals, just food agents you probably already cook with, anyway.
Step 3: Rinse your bottle good and behold the squeaky clean splendor!
Staring at your immaculately clean bottles should make you feel dirty by contrast, so go take a shower.
If the dirt won’t come off, then its a psychological projection of the guilt you feel inside. You need either a few years psychotherapy, or a couple sessions of ayahuasca to get clean.
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But I promise I'll NEVER recommend anything that sucks!